Comments on How to be a Badass Dad: Communicating with your Spouse 101

Another great tip - Don't try to solve her problem...

2009-03-31T16:41:00.000-05:00

Another great tip - Don't try to solve her problems unless she asks.

If she says "I had a terrible day, my boss unloaded an extra project on me and I don't have time to do the one I'm working on now." Don't respond with "Well you should..." instead show that you care by saying something like "I bet that's stressful."

A lot of times she just wants to vent but for some reason we think she's asking for advice or help when she's not and this can make her even more frustrated.

Deguello-

I don't think that striving for u...

2009-02-20T07:43:00.000-06:00

Deguello-

I don't think that striving for understanding or validating feelings is pussy. I don't think that anything here "caters" to women, like Anon says, either. I don't think there has to be a winner, a loser, or even concessions made in communication.

The true skill of a person's relationships must surround empathy and understanding. There's certainly nothing here that says "give in, do whatever she says" or "She's right, you're wrong" or the other way round. It's a simple plea for understanding, patience, and communication.

When I find myself taking an issue personally that is simply a matter of communication, I disengage myself as much as I can from my ego and try and find the other perspective. I ask the same of anyone else, of course, but I know that if I cannot do it, I cannot expect someone else to. Taking the lead in these situations is not only noble but necessary.

If a man cannot feel masculine while skillfully navigating a relationship, he has emasculated himself. Certainly fabrications and cliches of manhood do not make one manly. If that is so, we've let everyone else do our thinking and feeling for us.

I agree with anonymous...I am seeing the pussifica...

2009-02-19T23:38:00.000-06:00

I agree with anonymous...I am seeing the pussification of men always having to validate the feelings of women. They need to understand our issues as well. Other wise it spirals out of control where you get your woman always screaming that you are not validating their feelings...

I am married, and I do engage in discussion...this just seems extreme in some of its points.

Best & Great Post!! Every Guy should read this...

2009-01-21T10:33:00.000-06:00

Best & Great Post!! Every Guy should read this once.

Geetha

hey great article for women too. My husband and I...

2009-01-16T18:38:00.000-06:00

hey great article for women too. My husband and I get into those situations where I feel he is trying to spend time with me, but isn't communicating so I feel like there must me something wrong or he's mad at me. This points out that there are times when he's just going to be quiet and enjoy my company, even if we aren't going to be saying much.

I'll be forwarding this to my hubby so he can read it as well!

blush

2008-03-18T19:26:00.000-05:00

*blush*

I just discovered your blog and I think that I wan...

2008-03-18T17:57:00.000-05:00

I just discovered your blog and I think that I want to marry you! Instead, I'm going to forward a link to my own (very wonderful) husband, so that he can read your blog, too.

really good observations and great tips but I thin...

2008-03-18T09:19:00.000-05:00

really good observations and great tips but I think this is not only a great read for men but also for women too. It helped me remember that my husband is a guy and not one of my girlfriends or sisters. While yes it's great when he does follow those basic tips for the most part. I do beleive that women also need to remember and not "nag" there man whenever he's quiet for more then a 15 min. If there is something wrong? for the most part, he'll let you know.

While I think some of these points are valid and w...

2008-02-29T15:54:00.000-06:00

While I think some of these points are valid and well observed (e.g. don't belittle her) I think some go too far toward catering to women and don't do enough to allow men to act like men. I understand communication is important, but I disagree that it's such a significant cause of broken marriages (even if women tend to blame their divorces on it). I think it's important for each side to make concessions to a degree. I'm not sure if you intended for this article to be one-sided, but I think there are few opportunities for women to do their part in helping with communication issues (like not stressing out if your husband hasn't said anything to you in the last 15 minutes). Yes men can be over-rational, but women can be over-emotional. Like many things in life, the middle ground is the best place to be.

Thank you for submitting your post to Carnival Of Tips!

Great tips - unfortunately, communication has been the biggest problem I've known in most failed relationships.