During the first trimester of pregnancy, one of the most ridiculous things happens: the body creates a new organ on par with a liver or a set of lungs. This doubles the amount of blood that the mother is houses, and makes her tired and hungry. It's discarded after the baby is born and most people don't think about them ever again.
When my golden retriever had puppies when I was little, I watched in amazement as she ate absolutely everything that came out of her except her babies. My parents narrated this, explained this, and still the image was foreign enough to last me a lifetime. I later learned that people are one of the few mammals that don't eat their placentas (camels are the others. Why? I think it's because camels are assholes). But the explanation for doing it always seemed reasonable: that it gives the birther much needed iron (and, therefore, energy) and that it can even go a long way towards balancing the body and decreasing the chance of postpartum depression.
I've heard of people planting placentas beneath trees and I've heard of the very adventurous eating them by frying, blending into a smoothie, or even throwing down and munching the thing raw right then and there. None of that seemed a likely outcome for my wife. But since she has a rich history of PPD, we thought it was worth exploring different ways to ingest the placenta.
My wife cannot even cook a steak. This is how grossed out she is by raw meat. She likes cooked meat but refused to discuss eating the placenta ("Think about it! A meat that you can eat without killing anyone!" didn't serve as a good argument). So I took on the task of encapsulation.
My midwife has had some experience with the process and she took a few minutes to explain the process to me. What's better, she even loaned me all the equipment that I needed. The entire process (not counting dehydration) only took an hour or maybe a little more. I'll write out my process below; I was going to take pictures for this purpose, but my wife urged me against it:
1. First, you have to wash the placenta. Take the placenta and rinse it off thoroughly in a clean sink. Cut off what's left of the cord and of the membrane--it's too stringy and very hard to cut up with the rest of it.
2. Slice the placenta into long strips. This was a little hard to do since I had frozen it (I couldn't get around to it for a few days and knew it was better to keep it on ice) and my hands kept getting cold. A very sharp knife is understandably helpful during this process.
3. Lay the strips out jerky-style in the food dehydrator. We used a Magic Chef dehydrator that you can buy in any Target. Since it wasn't a huge cut of meat, it only needed two shelves. We put it out in the garage so that we didn't have to think that we were smelling it. We left it on for 48 hours.
4. Once the strips are very dark, grind them up in a coffee grinder. I snapped them into shorter pieces first. Make sure you have a nice space laid out for this, with something disposable like newspaper down--it gets dusty.
5. Now, the only part that takes any real time. You need empty capsules to fill. You can do this individually by hand, or by using a "Capsule Machine." They are not expensive, but they are totally worth it, from my point of view (of course, my was lent to me, so I paid for nothing).
6. Make sure the capsules are closed tightly, no matter what method you use. Then put them in a bag!
Our placenta yielded about 250 capsules. My wife takes three a day along with her other vitamin supplements. Does it work? Is it worth it? We're not set up for an actual scientific experiment and there are just too many variables to consider doing one at this level. In fact, there are very few scientific studies about this and it shouldn't surprise you--where's the money in stopping PPD without antidepressants? A placenta, after all, is absolutely free.
Here's what we know: this is my wife's fourth birth. We are Eight weeks out of it and she is not on any kind of antidepressant. This is the first time that has been the case. Is it the placenta? We can't be sure, but we'll take the win any way we can!
Monday, December 5, 2011
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Struggling with Weight: the No-Diet perspective
If someone you know loses weight, don't ask them what diet they used. That's like giving a marathoner's shoes credit, or asking an artist what paintbrush brand she uses when admiring a painting. It's the person that does the work, not the equipment.
I've been struggling with my weight since the 4th grade. I went up through the 27th grade last year. This is frightful math. So when someone simplifies the notion of weight loss with a quick-fix diet, or points out that "it's calories in, calories out," I feel like they think I'm stupid. Just like every thinking American of my age, I understand the properties of weight loss. I understand how to get in shape. If all it took was going on Atkins, or Weight Watchers, or South Beach, I would have ended my struggle 20 years ago. I've been on every diet. I've lost weight on every diet. Yet I'm still in terrible shape. And I'm not stupid! I've been through the 27th grade, after all.
I'm stating this because it's true: you cannot simply get in shape by going on a diet. And yet, any diet--any of them--can get you to lose weight. You can buy every diet book, log every meal, attend every meeting, but this is like saying that the answer to writing a novel is typing.
The anolgy of maintaining your body like you maintain a car is over used and out of date. If your car were an evolved, emotional animal thrust into an unhealthy modern society with volumes of suppressed emotions being capitalized on by a heartless food industry, then we'd be a little closer to the mark. Your car is a machine and you are not. You don't have to work hard to use the right fuel and you don't have an emotional breakdown at every oil change. Your body is not a damn car. Will health classes finally stop saying this?
Why do we suppose that a duet is how to lose weight? The same reasons that we have for thinking a better car will make us happy or that one soap is better than another: advertising. It shouldn't surprise anyone; much of American discontent is caused by advertising. The diet industry puts billions of dollars a year toward convincing us that diets are normal and even necessary. They put billions toawrds making us form a precognitive link between diet and weight loss. We are pretty defenseless against this. The same way that evolution has left us defenseless against a tiger's claws.
When someone loses weight, it is through hard work, daily struggle, determination, strength, support, battles with fear, dependence on love, questions of faith, feelings of guilt and worthlessness, thoughts of meaninglessness, and finally feelings of triumph and relief. It is not simple. It is not calories in and calories out. It is not counting carbs and weighing food. It is a deep, powerful, and frightening personal commitment. Do not discount their struggle and accomplishment by asking if they "used Atkins" or "did weight watchers."
This is not a triumph of formula or corporate eating plan. It is a triumph of humanity. Don't discount it. Don't dare.
It is hard. I'm at it again. For the 24th year in a row. I'm down 40 lbs from my all-time high of a few years ago, but I've got a solid 50 or more to lose before I can think about stopping. It's been 3 weeks of hard work, rough days, fighting my surroundings and my every impulse. And its getting harder. I haven't been proud of myself for days. So what if I'm 11pounds down from where I started? It means nothing if I stop now.
We need to refocus. We need to retool. We need to remember that nothing external can make you change, that you are constantly reinventing yourself. So reinvent yourself the way you want to be. And take credit for it. Never, ever say "it was easy."
I've been struggling with my weight since the 4th grade. I went up through the 27th grade last year. This is frightful math. So when someone simplifies the notion of weight loss with a quick-fix diet, or points out that "it's calories in, calories out," I feel like they think I'm stupid. Just like every thinking American of my age, I understand the properties of weight loss. I understand how to get in shape. If all it took was going on Atkins, or Weight Watchers, or South Beach, I would have ended my struggle 20 years ago. I've been on every diet. I've lost weight on every diet. Yet I'm still in terrible shape. And I'm not stupid! I've been through the 27th grade, after all.
I'm stating this because it's true: you cannot simply get in shape by going on a diet. And yet, any diet--any of them--can get you to lose weight. You can buy every diet book, log every meal, attend every meeting, but this is like saying that the answer to writing a novel is typing.
The anolgy of maintaining your body like you maintain a car is over used and out of date. If your car were an evolved, emotional animal thrust into an unhealthy modern society with volumes of suppressed emotions being capitalized on by a heartless food industry, then we'd be a little closer to the mark. Your car is a machine and you are not. You don't have to work hard to use the right fuel and you don't have an emotional breakdown at every oil change. Your body is not a damn car. Will health classes finally stop saying this?
Why do we suppose that a duet is how to lose weight? The same reasons that we have for thinking a better car will make us happy or that one soap is better than another: advertising. It shouldn't surprise anyone; much of American discontent is caused by advertising. The diet industry puts billions of dollars a year toward convincing us that diets are normal and even necessary. They put billions toawrds making us form a precognitive link between diet and weight loss. We are pretty defenseless against this. The same way that evolution has left us defenseless against a tiger's claws.
When someone loses weight, it is through hard work, daily struggle, determination, strength, support, battles with fear, dependence on love, questions of faith, feelings of guilt and worthlessness, thoughts of meaninglessness, and finally feelings of triumph and relief. It is not simple. It is not calories in and calories out. It is not counting carbs and weighing food. It is a deep, powerful, and frightening personal commitment. Do not discount their struggle and accomplishment by asking if they "used Atkins" or "did weight watchers."
This is not a triumph of formula or corporate eating plan. It is a triumph of humanity. Don't discount it. Don't dare.
It is hard. I'm at it again. For the 24th year in a row. I'm down 40 lbs from my all-time high of a few years ago, but I've got a solid 50 or more to lose before I can think about stopping. It's been 3 weeks of hard work, rough days, fighting my surroundings and my every impulse. And its getting harder. I haven't been proud of myself for days. So what if I'm 11pounds down from where I started? It means nothing if I stop now.
We need to refocus. We need to retool. We need to remember that nothing external can make you change, that you are constantly reinventing yourself. So reinvent yourself the way you want to be. And take credit for it. Never, ever say "it was easy."
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Mindfulness: Front-Loading Patience into Your Day
I had a rough day yesterday. It was a Tuesday, and I only had a night class to meet for my job and my kids happened to have had the day off from their schools. Now, this was a good thing to me. I thought, "Wow, I'll sleep in, we'll chill out, read some books, have some meals, sit by the fire; It'll rock!" But it's just not how the day turned out.
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The day started with whining. Daylight Savings just ended and the 2 year old didn't get the memo that we get an extra hour of sleep in addition to having the day off for the big kids. Plus, we got to bed late and the baby was fussy all night. But the 6am whining started things off on a bad note.
When the big girls got up, there was more whining. Breakfast was taking too long, there were bad dreams, no one wants to take the dogs out, it's too cold, and on and on. I got a little bit of productivity into my morning by going for a run, but after that, the baby was up and I held onto her to let my wife sleep a little after a rough night. I became irritable, grumpy, and down.
I found myself begging for more patience. I even thought to myself that I've written about the value and necessity of patience over and over again--here and here, for example. I knew better than to get all bothered and grumpy, especially when my entire family needs me. Somehow, having this intellectual understanding of what was going on didn't help my mood, but actually hurt it. I felt like I was an utter failure for not being the "fun Dad," but rather, being a total grump.
Things got worse because while I was now grumpy, my kids were fed and happy. They started playing and it was all "too loud" and "too noisy" and annoying. Why should they get to be in good moods when they've already ruined mine?
The repercussions lasted the whole day. I was touched-out and had no patience for the slightest complaint or tattle. Did I really want to be the kind of a father that would rather his kids be at school on a day off? No!
I gave it more thought. It was easier to think while I was driving to work that night. And a few things dawned on me.
Usually, I wake up before the kids. Lately, I've tried to wake up and do some exercises and make lunches before getting the kids up for school. This, I think, steels me for the day a bit. If can ride out the initial whining and grumping that a hungry morning can bring, then I can enjoy things once they get better.
Second, I was expecting too much. I was expecting that because they had the day off, they would sleep in just a little and that they would take care of themselves for the day. But we work very hard to put our kids into a routine. I've worked to make them used to getting out of bed at 6:30. And school works hard to give them structure. I want them to be unstructured at home, but that means that chaos should be a bit more welcome than a grumpy father is willing do take.
Now, sleep is important. Being overly tired from a lack of sleep can really take its toll on you. But with a newborn in the house, there's not a lot that you can do about it on any particular night. It's out of your control.
I often tell my students who are noticeably dragging during an 8am class that the world starts at 8am, that they have to get going if they want to have any modicum of control over the course of their day. I think that it's probably okay to *try* to sleep in once in a while, but I think that I will have to be more tolerant in giving up my control and giving it to my kids and their moods. Sometimes they wake up happy, sometimes they wake up whiny. I can't control that--especially if they wake up before I do.
It's the harder decision to make--to face your day head-on and try and take control. But I think that I've learned that I can't let days go by where I don't feel good about myself or about what I do for my family. My wife is going to be tired from breastfeeding all night. My kids are going to be kids. I need to be more solid than I want to be if I'm going to take an active role in how the day goes.
Being a parent is not a job, it's a joy. But sometimes, taking joy in something takes hard work. I mourn the loss of my day yesterday, a day I could have spent having fun with my kids, that I instead spent being upset. I will focus on this, work, wake up, and do better. Being a parent is also a process. There's always time to try again.
http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif
The day started with whining. Daylight Savings just ended and the 2 year old didn't get the memo that we get an extra hour of sleep in addition to having the day off for the big kids. Plus, we got to bed late and the baby was fussy all night. But the 6am whining started things off on a bad note.
When the big girls got up, there was more whining. Breakfast was taking too long, there were bad dreams, no one wants to take the dogs out, it's too cold, and on and on. I got a little bit of productivity into my morning by going for a run, but after that, the baby was up and I held onto her to let my wife sleep a little after a rough night. I became irritable, grumpy, and down.
I found myself begging for more patience. I even thought to myself that I've written about the value and necessity of patience over and over again--here and here, for example. I knew better than to get all bothered and grumpy, especially when my entire family needs me. Somehow, having this intellectual understanding of what was going on didn't help my mood, but actually hurt it. I felt like I was an utter failure for not being the "fun Dad," but rather, being a total grump.
Things got worse because while I was now grumpy, my kids were fed and happy. They started playing and it was all "too loud" and "too noisy" and annoying. Why should they get to be in good moods when they've already ruined mine?
The repercussions lasted the whole day. I was touched-out and had no patience for the slightest complaint or tattle. Did I really want to be the kind of a father that would rather his kids be at school on a day off? No!
I gave it more thought. It was easier to think while I was driving to work that night. And a few things dawned on me.
Usually, I wake up before the kids. Lately, I've tried to wake up and do some exercises and make lunches before getting the kids up for school. This, I think, steels me for the day a bit. If can ride out the initial whining and grumping that a hungry morning can bring, then I can enjoy things once they get better.
Second, I was expecting too much. I was expecting that because they had the day off, they would sleep in just a little and that they would take care of themselves for the day. But we work very hard to put our kids into a routine. I've worked to make them used to getting out of bed at 6:30. And school works hard to give them structure. I want them to be unstructured at home, but that means that chaos should be a bit more welcome than a grumpy father is willing do take.
Now, sleep is important. Being overly tired from a lack of sleep can really take its toll on you. But with a newborn in the house, there's not a lot that you can do about it on any particular night. It's out of your control.
I often tell my students who are noticeably dragging during an 8am class that the world starts at 8am, that they have to get going if they want to have any modicum of control over the course of their day. I think that it's probably okay to *try* to sleep in once in a while, but I think that I will have to be more tolerant in giving up my control and giving it to my kids and their moods. Sometimes they wake up happy, sometimes they wake up whiny. I can't control that--especially if they wake up before I do.
It's the harder decision to make--to face your day head-on and try and take control. But I think that I've learned that I can't let days go by where I don't feel good about myself or about what I do for my family. My wife is going to be tired from breastfeeding all night. My kids are going to be kids. I need to be more solid than I want to be if I'm going to take an active role in how the day goes.
Being a parent is not a job, it's a joy. But sometimes, taking joy in something takes hard work. I mourn the loss of my day yesterday, a day I could have spent having fun with my kids, that I instead spent being upset. I will focus on this, work, wake up, and do better. Being a parent is also a process. There's always time to try again.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Repost: Top 5 Halloween Specials
I'm reposting this one because it's getting a ton of hits right now and I want to be sure to update the links. The links, in fact, have gotten much better this year; They change from year to year with copyright nonsense.
What a lot of the younger generation doesn't know is that before prime-time shows had so much clout, networks used to play lots of specials for ratings, especially around the holidays. These days, viewers don't want to put up with a disruption in 24 or Survivor because of something so insignificant as All Hallow's. Maybe--just maybe--a sitcom will do a Halloween-themed episode for the enjoyment of the season. The Simpsons has a string of great ones--but because of Baseball season, they only play in November, rendering them pointless, at best, until the season hits DVD.
So if you're looking for some good ole Halloween specials to show your kids, so that they can know a different age of the commercial side of things, here are my top 5 ones:
Garfield's Halloween Adventure
This is a classic. Before Garfield had his Saturday morning show, he was only used on TV for special presentations like this one. What I loved most about this one as a kid was the fact that Garfield has such a perfect adventure for the night. First of all, he and Odie dress like pirates. Awesome. Then they go trick-or-treating, which is treated as mildly scary. And from there they live every kid's fantasy: a real adventure begins for them with real dangers, like pirate ghosts!
Ray Bradbury's "The Halloween Tree"
Bradbury was disappointed with many of the Halloween specials out there. Mainly, he couldn't stand the Charlie Brown and the Great Pumpkin special. He thought it was such a let-down for kids; the pumpkin never comes, friendships don't mend, there is no adventure to speak of. Bradbury wanted to make something for kids that would be exciting and would teach some of the roots of the holiday. It's pretty well done, as is the book.
Witch's Night Out
Update: My sister found it online!
http://www.veoh.com/watch/v2051825597qPbeFB?h1=Witch%27s+Night+Out
Unfortunately, there is no video for this one. The copyright holders requested that it be removed from YouTube, and it is not in print in any DVD or VHS anymore. It was a rare jewel, indeed though. This cartoon stared Gilda Radner, made little or no real sense, had a low-budget feel, but somehow was essential to my Halloweens as a child. It has an IMDB page, but don't be fooled by that cover shot; it was an addition to the 1994 VHS release and has absolutely nothing to do with the movie, whatsoever. Let me know if you ever get a hold of this one.
Halloween is Grinch Night
Irreparably inferior to the Grinch's Christmas outing, this one still has a lot to offer. Suess wrote this for the small screen directly, skipping print publication. It's a silly little story of a boy who challenges the Grinch on Halloween and stands up in the face of a grade-A scaring. The fright fest that the Grinch imposes on this boy is really the best part. You just have to get over the fact that this is no Grinch Stole Christmas.
Legend of Sleepy Hallow
There's nothing like this one. While the Halloweenish part only last the last five minutes or so, the autumnal atmosphere is complete throughout. Bing Crosby is a lot of fun as narrator and every voice. This cartoon is rarely seen these days.
Bonus:
Disney's Halloween Treat
This was a straight-to-video release that made several rounds on the Disney Channel and ABC's Wonderful World of Disney back in the 80's. It's a rehashing of scary bits of Disney movies put together by a cheap little talking pumpkin. Despite the low budget, it remains the best way to see the best clips of the headless horseman, Night on Bald Mountain, and several other Disney classic clips.
Bonus: Silly Symphonies Skeleton Dance
You just don't see cartoons like this. Walt made this one back in the 30's before the cartoon genre was defined as purley for kids. It's creepy, it's weird, and there are strange perspectives used that don't ever pop up in cartoondom again (watch for when the skeleton jumps at the screen).
Hopefully these classic Halloween specials will help to remind you of your childhood and what made the holiday special for you. I'm a staunch proponent of the holiday and am working on a more serious posting about it soon.
What a lot of the younger generation doesn't know is that before prime-time shows had so much clout, networks used to play lots of specials for ratings, especially around the holidays. These days, viewers don't want to put up with a disruption in 24 or Survivor because of something so insignificant as All Hallow's. Maybe--just maybe--a sitcom will do a Halloween-themed episode for the enjoyment of the season. The Simpsons has a string of great ones--but because of Baseball season, they only play in November, rendering them pointless, at best, until the season hits DVD.
So if you're looking for some good ole Halloween specials to show your kids, so that they can know a different age of the commercial side of things, here are my top 5 ones:
Garfield's Halloween Adventure
This is a classic. Before Garfield had his Saturday morning show, he was only used on TV for special presentations like this one. What I loved most about this one as a kid was the fact that Garfield has such a perfect adventure for the night. First of all, he and Odie dress like pirates. Awesome. Then they go trick-or-treating, which is treated as mildly scary. And from there they live every kid's fantasy: a real adventure begins for them with real dangers, like pirate ghosts!
Ray Bradbury's "The Halloween Tree"
Bradbury was disappointed with many of the Halloween specials out there. Mainly, he couldn't stand the Charlie Brown and the Great Pumpkin special. He thought it was such a let-down for kids; the pumpkin never comes, friendships don't mend, there is no adventure to speak of. Bradbury wanted to make something for kids that would be exciting and would teach some of the roots of the holiday. It's pretty well done, as is the book.
Witch's Night Out
Update: My sister found it online!
http://www.veoh.com/watch/v2051825597qPbeFB?h1=Witch%27s+Night+Out
Unfortunately, there is no video for this one. The copyright holders requested that it be removed from YouTube, and it is not in print in any DVD or VHS anymore. It was a rare jewel, indeed though. This cartoon stared Gilda Radner, made little or no real sense, had a low-budget feel, but somehow was essential to my Halloweens as a child. It has an IMDB page, but don't be fooled by that cover shot; it was an addition to the 1994 VHS release and has absolutely nothing to do with the movie, whatsoever. Let me know if you ever get a hold of this one.
Halloween is Grinch Night
Irreparably inferior to the Grinch's Christmas outing, this one still has a lot to offer. Suess wrote this for the small screen directly, skipping print publication. It's a silly little story of a boy who challenges the Grinch on Halloween and stands up in the face of a grade-A scaring. The fright fest that the Grinch imposes on this boy is really the best part. You just have to get over the fact that this is no Grinch Stole Christmas.
Legend of Sleepy Hallow
There's nothing like this one. While the Halloweenish part only last the last five minutes or so, the autumnal atmosphere is complete throughout. Bing Crosby is a lot of fun as narrator and every voice. This cartoon is rarely seen these days.
Bonus:
Disney's Halloween Treat
This was a straight-to-video release that made several rounds on the Disney Channel and ABC's Wonderful World of Disney back in the 80's. It's a rehashing of scary bits of Disney movies put together by a cheap little talking pumpkin. Despite the low budget, it remains the best way to see the best clips of the headless horseman, Night on Bald Mountain, and several other Disney classic clips.
Bonus: Silly Symphonies Skeleton Dance
You just don't see cartoons like this. Walt made this one back in the 30's before the cartoon genre was defined as purley for kids. It's creepy, it's weird, and there are strange perspectives used that don't ever pop up in cartoondom again (watch for when the skeleton jumps at the screen).
Hopefully these classic Halloween specials will help to remind you of your childhood and what made the holiday special for you. I'm a staunch proponent of the holiday and am working on a more serious posting about it soon.
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